One has to wonder which would have given Kafka a bigger headache – MPN’s or voice mail message systems. ((I think I dislike voice mail message systems more…)) ((Photo courtesy of marcelgermain)) Finding a medical provider within an MPN is no walk in the park. ((Heck, I’m a defense attorney and I’m not crazy about Medical Provider Networks.))
I get frustrated when I need to find a medical provider within an MPN. If I’m very lucky, I get lost in a maze of badly laid out pages or meaningless search screens. If I’m not so lucky the MPN website has changed, moved, or no longer exists.
Anyhow, I wanted to extend a “thank you” to all the users of this website who help me maintain my Medical Provider Network website page. It seems like just about every week some kind person sends me a new MPN website link or updated MPN password. ((Once an insurance company sent me their updated MPN page!))
This last weekend I stayed overnight at a hotel in Chico. In the planters next to the parking lot they had placed these disclaimers/warning labels that read, “OXFORD SUITE HOTEL NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WATER SPOTTING DUE TO SPRINKLERS.” ((Sign, parking lot, shrubbery, and wood chips are the sole responsibility of Oxford Suite Hotel – no matter what disclaimers they put up. Photo by Jay Shergill, all rights reserved.))
This brought to mind any number of responses:
“Oxford Suite Hotel not responsible for water”
“Oxfor Suite Hotel not responsible for H2O on your H2”
“Oxford Suite Hotel: You failed physics in high school, didn’t you?”
“Oxford Suite Hotel: Newton and Einstein – what bastards!”
“Oxford Suite Hotel: Life’s tough. Buy a helmet.”
“Oxford Suite Hotel not responsible for the administration of midnight beating for people who complain about water spotting due to sprinklers. You brought that on yourself.”
I’m sure some idiot called their management to complain about how the sprinklers had left spots on their car. When you think about it, Oxford Suite Hotel should be responsible for the installation, functioning, and maintenance of their own sprinklers, just as people who own vehicles should be responsible for the care and maintenance of their own vehicles.
There’s no making some people happy. If they are going to complain about thier vehicle getting wet, while it’s outside, they’re going to complain about the lighting, the room, the service, the sheets, the ice being too cold, the A.C. being too loud, and the TV being too dry.
Here’s a decent business model: sprinklers automatically spray a customer’s car as soon as they pull up. If they moan about spotting, send them on their way. If they thank you for washing their car, offer them a complimentary breakfast with their stay.
In any case, I blame the huge evil sign industry that has purchased our elected officials.
Get ready to stop paying people to do Ogilvie calculations, recycle your Gearheart/Gerlach handouts, and delete your Frost Excel spreadsheet. ((Sorry Jeff, Mark, Mark, and Ray!)) We’re about to go all “Beautiful Mind.”
Yesterday while at the Oakland WCAB an Applicant’s attorney mentioned he noticed an interesting trend in the Ogilvie formula. ((Thank you “S”! Unfortunately, he did not want to be named.)) ((Man, I *wish* I could take credit for this observation.)) He said that whenever he does an Ogilvie calculation for someone with a 100% earnings loss and a modest WPI, the WPI is always increased by 18. ((Not multiplied by 18, but an addition of 18.))
I ran a number of test calculations on this theory and it appeared to be right. My calculations show that up to a WPI of 44 the increase appears to always be 18.1, but the last “0.1” always gets rounded down. However, appearing to be right just isn’t good enough for me. And, because I am just truly that nerd, here’s the fully mathematical proof:
Let’s break down the calculations at the heart of Ogilvie:
Earnings Loss ((PIESSE = Post Injury Earnings of Similarly Situated Employees)) ((PIEA = Post Injury Earnings of Applicant))
= (PIESSE – PIEA) / PIESSE
= ($1.00 – $0.00) / $1.00
= $1.00 / $1.00
= 1
= 100%
Individualized Proportional Earnings Loss
= (WPI / Earnings Loss) / 100
= (WPI / 100% )/100
= (WPI / 1) / 100
= WPI / 100
Thus, for any WPI less than 45 and a total loss of earnings, the Individualized Earnings Loss will always be less than 0.450 in Table A.
If you have an Applicant with a 100% post injury earnings loss and a WPI of 44 or less, you should rebut the FEC and arrive at an adjusted WPI that is equal to the original WPI plus 18.1.
Therefore, I propose a new Ogilvie formula that will be easy for anyone to remember:
Step 1: If the injured worker has a 100% earnings loss and a WPI of 44 or less, add 18.1 to the WPI and round down.
Step 2: If the injured worker has less than 100% earnings loss or a WPI of 45 or higher, go to Step 3.
Step 3: For heaven’s sake, just make your life easier and use the calculators here at PDRater.com.
Researchers at the Keele University in England recently discovered that people report less pain when swearing. (Via Slashdot) And…cue the workers’ compensation jokes:
Depositions:
Q: Mr. Smith, what else helps alleviate your pain?
A: [DELETED]
Q: Counsel, maybe we should go off the record for a moment…
Court reporters:
“I need to get the spellings for a few words…”
Interpreters:
“Uh, could you translate that again?”
Trials:
Judge: Madam reporter, would you please read that back…
Appeals:
WHEREFORE the above and foregoing, Defendants respectfully pray that this Board grant reconsideration and find Applicant refused reasonable prescribed medical treatment and should therefore be denied temporary disability benefits.
Legal research:
“$ This search is outside your research plan.”
Medical treatment:
“Actually, a telephone conference with my doctor should be sufficient.”
“Where do I look this up under the ACOEM guidelines?”
“Just how the crap am I supposed to write the damn utilization review appeal for this one???”
“I’m sorry, doctor, I must have read this prescription wrong…”
“Why is this doctor prescribing a speech therapist for a back injury?”
“By the way, your nurse case manager is Andrew Dice Clay.”
“Although my level of disability was lowered after SB 899, I sure find that talking about it helps.”
“In other news, researchers in Nevada have found that gambling, hookers, and dry weather also reduce pain.”
I’m not really a workers’ compensation attorney, I’m really just a failed comic.
Yesterday morning I was driving to the San Jose Workers’ Compensation Appeals Board along 680 in the midst of some pretty gnarly traffic. A woman followed me in her black Infiniti from roughly Danville to Dublin, tailgating. ((Photo courtesy of BillyPalooza))
She was following me so closely, I could literally read her lips as she was chanting, “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.”
